What happens when you start following your instincts? What happens when you start to think for yourself even if it means spending more time alone? What happens when you take a leap off the ledge? Amazing things happen. Perhaps I am biased, but recently I had about 48 hours of anxiety followed by pure bliss. I got my dream job in a city I can’t wait to live in.
It seems a little wrong, right? I graduated about three weeks ago and now will be heading out to work at an organization that is doing some monumental things in the entrepreneurship world. Hell, they’re doing big things in the world in general. I have never been more honored to be welcomed onto a team. I do feel a little guilty. How does this happen? Shouldn’t I be struggling to make ends meet and pounding the pavement with my well designed resume in hand? Shouldn’t I be crying about school loans and worrying about some dude who doesn’t text me back?
Multitasking Myself Crazy
The answer is this: I already did those things. While some students were partying and throwing up in parking lots, I did it too once, I was literally working my ass off. I was joining meetups, projects, & working as many jobs as I needed to. My college years suffered academically due to these issues.
There is a 90% chance that I was masking feelings of sadness with jobs and projects. “I like to stay busy,” I told the world. While true, if you leave the house and forget to put on a bra, you are too damn busy! If you forget which job you’re going to, you are too damn busy!
I’m not implying you to pity me, please don’t. I just want to make it clear that if you really, really want something…nothing can hold you back. There were countless times in my 4.5 years at college where I felt as if my world had ended. Sometimes, I was right for thinking that. Sometimes, I was exaggerating. I view my time at University of Southern Indiana in many visuals. One reoccurring visual is that of me army crawling my way over broken wine bottles and overdraft statements from my bank.
Be Your Own Hero
We all have battles, it’s true. The key to really getting what you want from this life is to just fucking do it man. Just fucking do it. For me, one of my biggest secrets was that of finances. I had an abundance of jobs and great projects but my income was comical. There were periods of my life where I had .05 to my name.
Current day, I’m no rich woman, but I can now afford more than a sandwich most days and for that I am simply thankful. There were nights I found myself crying in bed because I was so broke. The bills just…kept…coming. It’s funny how that works. Bills come back every month, did you know?
Other life events crippled me too. Matters of rotten family members, confusing courses that I ultimately failed, and the crazy world that is modern dating. All of the above are very common annoyances for the young person. But if I had lived an easy college career, I promise you I would not be packing my bags for Seattle in lieu of my dream job. I would be settling somewhere not far from my hometown. There’s nothing wrong with staying close to home, but it’s not for me.
I hope you can quiet your fears and stressors for a few minutes a week. Think about where you want to be and get there. The rest will figure itself out. Because it always does. Envision the person you hope to be and not the job you hope to obtain. To help funnel those dreams, pick a city or a region. Then, you’ll work your way to a roof over your head and friends to share wine with on a Wednesday night. You can have all the things in life, as long as you work for it and just fucking do it. Things will work out as they should.
“Follow your bliss & the universe will open doors where there were only walls.” Joseph Campbell